Me Too has been talking for months about wanting a hamster. Her birthday is coming up, and she asked Daddy several weeks ago if she could have one. To my surprise and mild horror, he said okay.
Since then, Me Too has chosen what color cage she wants to buy (pink,) what she wants to name it (Flower,) and even what she will feed it (cupcakes), professional advice and biological science be damned.
HRH should have been aware of this. It’s the first thing Sister talks about every morning, after all. But apparently he doesn’t listen. He claims to not remember telling her she could have the hamster to start with. “Even if I did say it, I thought she would forget!” he said.
Babe, you just can’t do that. This isn’t like a gum ball or something minor, and Me Too doesn’t forget about gum balls and minor things, anyway. He should know that! Yes, Brother is much more easily distracted, but Sister is not. Once she has her heart set on something (which is very rare,) she will NOT forget. And from her point of view, if she ends up not being able to get the hamster then her parents will have lied to her.
Thanks so much for putting me in that position.
HRH thinks I’m being overly dramatic about this, that Me Too will forget about the hamster. So he brings home a freaking fish. Worse than that, it’s not even a fancy fish. It isn’t even pink.
And then there are the things that HRH didn’t bring home: an aquarium, net, fish food, basically everything you need to care for a fish. He casually mentions I should go pick up this stuff tomorrow. Apparently I need to work more on my dart-shooting-from-eyes skills because he didn’t immediately fall over when he said that. This is HIS doing. I have my hands full of humans, and will have nothing to do with this fiasco. Besides, our local supermarket doesn’t have pet stuff. For me to do that would mean putting both kids into after-care (and paying for it,) going by train to a pet shop, and then lugging home an aquarium.
Hello, HRH, welcome to Earth! We don’t do that here.
As I write, the dojo loach in question is in a bucket on the balcony. Apparently we will now spend the weekend throwing crap away to make room for an aquarium to hold this savage beast.
And Me Too? Her first reaction was, “Oh, the fish and my hamster can be friends!”
Of course they can, dear.