If if if

The kids started back to school this week. Sort of.

Brother went in the morning and then came home for lunch on Monday. Tuesday was a regular for him, but I didn’t know that until he came home with the school Monday afternoon.

Sister went for just the morning on Wednesday. When I went to pick her up, I discovered this morning-only madness would continue for the rest of the week.

For the regular price of 300USD a month, of course.


I don’t mind the kids coming home early, not much anyway, and certainly not Me Too. 9-2 four days a week (Wednesday is always a short day) is kind of a lot for her. She comes home overtired and impossible. On morning-only days, she’s easier to deal with, and our afternoons are much more pleasant.

What I do mind is this not-knowing-the-monthly-schedule-until-the-first-schoolday-of-the-month bullshit.

Even as a SAHM on the very bottom of the totem pole of society, I do have things I have to do, places I have to go. Namely my OTHER kid’s school. Although there are occasionally other things like trips to the dentist or that pap smear that is five years overdue. (So many women don’t go that the government issues a free coupon for all women when they turn 35. Note to government of Japan: the reason we aren’t going is NOT because of the cost. It’s because we can’t make a goddamn appointment when we don’t know ahead of time when our children will be coming home!)

But the schools working against each other is what really takes the cake for me. It’s almost laughable, except that it isn’t funny to the child whose parents chose to go to the sibling’s thing instead.

I remember receiving some unsolicited advice about this once. Actually that’s a joke. Anyone who has ever incubated a fetus knows you receive unsolicited advice pretty much constantly. From everyone.

Anyway, the advice was to always prioritize the older child. If you do that from the beginning, then it’s never an issue.


It’s not bad advice, really. Older children suffer from having parents who are amateurs, after all.

If my oldest was a girl and the second was a boy, if Me First wasn’t the first grandchild on both sides, if Japanese society didn’t favor men to start with, if if if, then maybe I could follow that advice. As it is? I try to be fair.

Which just pisses off both kids. Of course .


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Kym
    Jan 10, 2013 @ 18:13:10

    Hm, how would that work if you were breast feeding the second and the first one demanded that you play trains instead? Sounds like the not-very-well-thought-out kind of advice I heard quite a bit of too.


  2. gaijinwife
    Jan 11, 2013 @ 10:25:14

    I remember getting that advice when I had Marina. Look after toddler first and then feed the baby rah rah. Come April I will no doubt be joining in your pain of dealing with kinder and school. Joy joy :) Sounds like you might need to come down for a holiday… go on. please. We can BBQ and squif wine and let the kinds run round catching insects and shit. And you can stay here if it makes MIL uneasy for you to stay in next town over :p


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