The Halls

It doesn’t look like a cheerful place to me anymore. The gate seems more to trap children in than to keep strangers out. The play equipment is no longer vibrant and promising, whispering of shared secrets and plans. It stands stark and faded and forboding against a gray sky.

Even the cherry trees that celebrated our arrival in the spring two years ago, that invited sweet daydreams from the classroom window just last year, now seem cold and indifferent.

I’m reminded that I’m expected to send another child to this joyless place in six short months, to be pushed and shoved and called names and have her stuff ruined, and I shudder.

I took her with me this morning to talk to the teacher and the vice principal. I took her with me because I had no choice, but maybe I would have chosen to take her with me anyway.
I’ll take her when I go back this afternoon. We’ll see what they come up with this time. We’ll go home and comfort and cajole, wipe away tears with promises of blue skies and silver linings, even if I’m not sure such things exist.

And then the same things will happen all over again tomorrow. Or maybe I will just walk the earth, seemingly unfettered but chained inside with worry about what is happening in the halls.

Not that I’m overly dramatic or anything.


4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. bri65
    Oct 21, 2013 @ 14:10:42

    Truer words were never spoken!
    “One of the frustrating things about being a wife and mother is the unspoken expectation that I can somehow subconsciously keep track of everyone’s shit, all the time.”


  2. illahee
    Oct 22, 2013 @ 10:36:35

    fack. fack fack fack.

    i am so ANGRY. please know i am sending your son all the hugs. all of them.


  3. Stardust
    Oct 22, 2013 @ 23:00:52

    The parents of these kids who destroy your kids’ possessions should be demanded that they buy them new ones.
    I hope that teaches those kids a good lesson in respecting other people’s possessions.


  4. gaijinwife
    Oct 23, 2013 @ 11:43:25

    God, this makes me angry. So not fair for Me first and Me too – who has to know what is happening and get fearful before she even starts :(


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