Apparently some of you are still reading… wondering if I am around. I am here. Just not sure if I have a voice that anyone wants to hear.
Society seems very interested in women when we are young and not “spoken for.” Or when we are beginning our roles as mothers and wives, but after you’ve been at it for a while? The antics of babies and toddlers are cute. They distract us from our troubles. Older kids? Not so much. Their troubles remind us too much of our own. Turns out life is a lot like middle school, after all. What about teenagers? I guess we are interested in their stories, not their mothers’.
Or maybe women get too busy with the details of life.
Here’s a good example- I am home sick with the flu this week (thus the blog update.) My husband valiantly and with much fanfare announces that he will make breakfast and get the kids ready for school. He puts out bread (that his mom brought over,) then washes the dishes and yells at the kids to get ready. He hangs up the laundry, with much hemming and hawing about how hard that is to do in the morning before going to work. (Um, I, like do that every day? So I, like, know that already and stuff?) He gets himself ready and then goes to work.
Now, it’s not like yelling at the kids a general edict one time is gonna get things moving. So, I have to haul my phlegmtastic ass out of bed to search for “color pen” (this is some Japanese term that none of the the English speakers in this house understand,) sign papers, find socks, all that. Finally the kids go to school. I sit down to rest-
and then I see it.
The used cups and silverware and, as-God-is-my-witness, that milk carton, are still on the table.
(This is while I am still blissfully unaware that he has done only his own laundry and no one else’s.)
I’m not knocking my husband in particular. He tried, as in put in the minimum effort he could get away with and still feel entitled to get his feelings hurt and accuse me of being “picky” when I complain about it, then sulk and refuse to help for months. Tried and true recipe of men and children everywhere. (Sorry, mom!)
So many women are washing up the cups and silverware after all the other people in society all the time, that they don’t have the time or energy to get to the marrow of life. But it’s not like you can just leave it. Because no one else will do it and when child protection services comes, who are they gonna blame? You know it.
But anyway. I’ll try to carve out some little sliver of time. All of our voices and stories are important, but too many women are very effectively silenced by this…inertia of society around us. So let’s shake things up, one post at a time.